Stuck in a delirium
man searches for meaning
applying collyrium
to his unnoticeable leaning
in delirium he pretends
that even circle has its ends
he questions religion, nature
and the one who transcends
whenever asked of ideal
he embraces the threads
of trivial mends
he does encounter unfamiliarity
once in a while
lives in disparity
surrounded by cages of guile
stuck in a delirious state
he looks for the unknown
in the known mate
one could only wish he finally owns
the correct way to accommodate,
this anomaly
-js
Introduction
This piece started as a reflection on confusion, but not the kind that comes from chaos. It is closer to a state where the mind keeps searching for meaning even when it is not clear what it is looking for.
The poem follows that state. Not as something extreme, but as something familiar.
Searching for Meaning
The opening lines set the tone. There is a sense of constant searching, but the effort is directed outward rather than inward. The reference to applying collyrium suggests an attempt to sharpen perception, to make things clearer.
At the same time, it hints at forcing clarity where it may not exist. The search becomes less about understanding and more about trying to make something appear meaningful.
Forcing Conclusions
The idea that “even a circle has its ends” reflects a tendency to force structure onto things that are naturally open-ended.
There is a need to reach conclusions, to define things clearly, even when they resist definition. Questions about religion, nature, and existence emerge from this space, but they are approached with the expectation that answers must exist in a fixed form.
Redefining the Ideal
When the poem turns toward the idea of an ideal, it does not move toward improvement. Instead, it focuses on smaller adjustments.
Rather than aiming for something higher, there is a shift toward managing what already exists. The ideal is not rejected, but it is reduced into something more comfortable.
Living Within One’s Own Thinking
The lines about “cages of guile” point toward a different kind of limitation. The restriction is not external. It comes from within.
The more one thinks, analyzes, and interprets, the more layered things become. This can create distance rather than clarity, making it harder to step outside of one’s own perspective.
Looking for Answers in Others
In the final section, the search shifts toward people. There is an attempt to find something unknown within something familiar.
This suggests a reliance on others to provide clarity or direction. It is not necessarily a solution, but it reflects how the search for meaning often extends beyond the self.
Conclusion
The poem does not try to resolve the search it describes. It simply follows it.
It reflects a state where questions continue to exist without clear answers, and where the process of searching becomes as significant as whatever is being searched for.